From the time I can remember, I have sung to my kids at bedtime.

I realize this is not a unique tradition, but one in our household that we treasure nonetheless. Over the years, the nightly serenade has had different iterations: Rock-a-Bye Baby (sans the “down will come baby, cradle and all”), Hush Little Baby (with made-up verses…after all, who can remember anything after “and if that diamond ring don’t shine”?) and ultimately, Lullaby.

It has remained our nightly constant and provides not only a source of comfort, but a can’t-go-to-bed-unless-I-hear-it necessity. I’ve watched eyes roll back in tired heads, I’ve been commissioned to sing it again with desperate pleading, and even been accused of skipping a verse, all in an attempt to prolong the inevitable bedtime.

But tonight’s serenade took on a whole new meaning: after 3 nights away, Lullaby from the one-and-only returned. While I believe my voice could rival a herd of sick dogs, Carter seemed to think it was quite lovely.  In his just-about-asleep voice, he uttered:

“You sing Opera.”

(That’s little boy innocence for, “Mommy, I like it when you sing to me and I missed you when you were away.”)

Suddenly I’m inspired to go empty the dishwasher (again) and fold some (more) laundry.

I had just boarded the plane, Chicago-bound for a much-anticipated girls' weekend, and took a moment to close my eyes and pray as the Flight Attendants reviewed the safety information.  While not typically an anxious flyer, it was a natural inclination to call upon Him...for a safe flight, for discernment for the flight crew, for operating machinery...for blessings over each of the passengers on the flight and each member of my family while I was away.  My prayer quickly turned to praise, as it often does, as the quiet moments with God so obviously lead me to His Grace - and His PROVISION.

God put this word into my heart a few weeks ago while having lunch with my dear friend and Pastor, Nancy (who you already "met").  No word choice is an accident with Nancy.  She is deliberate in her linguistic selection and God has so abundantly blessed her with the word (no pun intended).  Prose just masterfully, poetically, spills from her mouth with such ease and purpose...with such intention.  I could listen to her for hours describe how she cleans a cat box (if she had a cat), so imagine a seemingly simple blessing over our meal as our server arrived with our lunch selections:  This certainly wasn't the pre-school version of "Thank you Father", nor the rehearsed, get-through-the-blessing-while-our-food-is-hot prayer.  No. This was a genuine, thoughtful expression of thanks that oozed of gratitude for THIS meal...THIS provision that He had afforded us - no less important than our breakfast earlier in the day or the one Jesus shared with His disciples on the night before He died. 

The word provision has lurked in my soul since Nancy led that prayer.  I changed that day, over that meal, from the simple use of that word. I simply heard it differently. Provision extends far beyond 'providing food' or even its use in legal settings. Provision, in the deeper sense of the word, means meeting needs...supplying means.

And isn't our God faithful to do just that?  As this word has continued to unravel, I have found myself giggling over how He 'meets our needs' and 'supplies our means' everywhere!  He takes care of everything!  Even Paul reminds us in 1 Timothy 6:17:  Command those to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment.  How great is this?  All that I have, all that I am, all that I get to experience, all that I feel, all that I do...is His provision for me.  It is that which HE provides...and with complete and purpose. 

While not all of His provisions are as desirable as others (like the delicious ahi tuna wrap I had that day at lunch), each one is designed for OUR good.  There are the obvious provisions, like those that came to mind during my pre-flight prayer:  the celebration of life for my friend that, in turn, provided an opportunity to connect with old friends, the group of people organizing her event, the invitation to go, the computer I have that allowed me to check available flights, the husband I have who embraced my request to go, the funds in our account to purchase the ticket and book the hotel, the warm clothes I have in my closet to wear during the cool snap in Chicago, and the sound of my children's voices on the other end of the phone saying, "I already miss you" as I boarded the plane.

While this list might easily be counterfeited for "blessings", I think it's important to note that we can call them what we may, but they are still an allowance - that our sweet Lord provides - that gives us an opportunity to experience life...abundant life...the life He called us to live. 

Sometimes we see them; often we don't.  But each provision has a purpose:  my lunch that day with Nancy satiated my hunger, provided nutrition to my body, and gave me a few hours of energy to continue His work.  But beyond than that, God provided an opportunity for Nancy and I to reconnect, discuss important work, perhaps even (hopefully) emulate Christ to those we interacted with. 

But not all provisions are that simple, are they?  They don't always come in the pretty packages I've described; rather, they often appear as uncomfortable experiences, a particularly difficult season in life, doubt, regret, indecision; the provision might be in the series of missed green lights, the event you can't attend, the child you never knew, or the pain you are experiencing watching another suffer.  Each of them, however awe-inspiring or fall-to-your-knees-inducing, are provisions for us to change or to grow, to shape or to influence, to stop or to listen. They each allow us an opportunity to glorify Him.  And isn't this ultimately our greatest purpose?  To glorify God and enjoy Him forever?

I grinned, when yet again, God put this word in my heart during my prayer on the plane.  He's working something out in me and I'm paying close attention.  I'm learning to ask less, "why me?", "why now?", "why not?" and listen more for "That's why."  This, in and of itself, is a great provision. 

And so I am reminded:

¹ The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
² He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
³ he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
for his name’s sake.
⁴ Even though I walk
through the darkest valley,^[a]
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

⁵ You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
⁶ Surely your goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever. (Psalm 23)

What I'm realizing is that "provision" is knowing, that every single moment of every single day, God is deliberating orchestrating all things for our good.  It is usually far and wide and often not seen or felt; instead, it is a movement.  It is a force that is at work, all the time, to give us just what we need...when we need it.  And how freeing it is to trust that...