I was
walking the hallways of my son's school this morning, awkwardly looking for a
classroom to jump in and observe, as part of the "In-House/Open-House"
event for parents. Also traveling the same hallway were other moms of rising
4th graders, presumably chatting about what they had observed for next year's
curriculum, which teacher they hoped their son or daughter would get, and how
quickly time is flying.
New to
this school, I don't know many of the moms and dads; we don't live close by, we
don't go to the church with which it is affiliated, and I don't get to spend a
lot of time on campus. Acclimation, while no fault of the school's, has been
slow for me. So when I saw the clump of women, I assumed it was an existing
friend group and that "someday" I'd be among one at the school too.
As if
reading my (subconcious) thoughts, one of the women turned around and offered a
warm smile, left the group and walked toward me, hand extended, and introduced
herself to me. "I'm Beth; it's our first year here. What is your name?"
Taken
by her warmth and quietly giggling that Beth was applying the "how to make
new friends 101" advice I give my
children, we began chatting. Quickly covering foundational topics ("What
brought you to this school?", "How is your son transitioning?",
yada yada), we very seamlessly drifted into topics that many close-knit friends
have yet to cover, let alone new acquaintances. As Beth shared some of the
challenges she faces with her children, I found myself freely sharing mine as
well. We had much in common that extended far beyond our choice for a
Christian-based education or acclimating to a new English curriculum.
Beth
mentioned a small bit of information about her son that happened to be
something I am working through with Carter. I gingerly - and with permission - asked
if she would share more. And she did.
What
strikes me about this morning's interaction is that I continue to be met with new
ways of thinking as it relates to God's charge of "loving one another."
John 13:34: “A new command I give you: Love
one another. As I have loved
you, so you must love one another."
Biblically,
love is simply more than warm feelings; it is an attitude that reveals itself
in action. But here's what I'm
learning: You have to begin somewhere. Even as action-oriented as we
all seem to be, "love" usually has to have a trigger. In day-to-day
interactions (by contrast to more obvious opportunities to serve), discipleship
(for me) often first begins with storytelling..."I'm struggling with something." And storytelling begins with a willingness
to share..."I'm considering sharing
my struggle with you." And a willingness to share begins with the
offer of another's heart..."Do I
feel safe to share my struggle with you? Am I willing to risk it for the sake
of building relationship?"
While perhaps a simple example, today Beth
approached me. Then she shared her struggle. Then she offered more upon my
inquisition...which allowed a connection beyond the superficial and into the
important. Her storytelling invited mine. We reciprocated vulnerability. We
offered loving words of encouragement. I cried. She compassionately responded
with tears of her own.
While there is plenty of opportunity to make John
13:34 far more alive in this single interaction - and we may as we continue the
journey of our shared struggle - we got started. That's the point. We began somewhere. We
invited the Holy Spirit into our conversation and interaction today and He
showed up. I believe He sent Beth to me today. And perhaps me to her.
But we never would have known had we not been
willing participants of "love"...even in its infancy.
